A slow breeze blows through the window. It wobbles with the old glass and sounds like an old Hammond B3 Organ, the pitch only changing at the speed of the wind. The curtains blow open and dance in the soft summer wind. No need for air conditioning tonight, no the wind is cool enough to just enjoy.

I’ve been so lonely, and I hope that things turn out right.  We sit at the kitchen table talking about our high school days and that was when we heard the thunder. A hard rain is gonna fall, I asked her if she would stay the night, no use in driving in the rain.

She giggled and told me that “I only want to stay so that I don’t have to be alone. It’s the truth. I don’t want to be alone another night”.

I tell her that it’s okay, that I’m lonely too. Two hearts lonely for each other.

Theres nothing like the taste of honey suckle in the summertime and that’s how I saw her. As honey suckle flowers with their tasty fluid tucked deep inside.

And I thought, if you come to me like that honey suckle I would fall into you like rain, a beautiful summer rain like the one coming tonight. You say we should take it out on the porch and enjoy the smell of rain permeating the air. There is nothing quite like the smell of coming rain as it makes its way to you. The grass perks up, ready to receive its blessings from the heavens. Even the trees open up their leaves for the glories from the sky. That beautiful rain that beats down on a summer evening. Leaving a smell that can never be described.

I tell her how much I love honey in the springtime and the place I buy it at old man Petersons place up the street. He had a bunch of those white hives in his back yard, and he never needed a bee suit, they knew him, and he got the honey by naked hand. And he has never been stung once. She laughs and tells me that she has heard the story many times. After all he is a legend in these parts.

I say out of the blues that comes from a broken heart, a love that everyone wants what they cant get. She asked me what I wanted, and I simply said, you.

“Why can’t you have me?” she asked.

“Because your heart belongs to another.” I state matter of fact.

I’ve been beaten down and kicked around enough to know when I’ve over stepped my bounds.

“I’m not with him anymore. I told you that was the only way I would come over tonight.” She said but she still wore his ring, I pointed that out.

“I wear that to remember where I came from, I’ll take it off when I’m ready. I’m just not ready quite yet.” She said almost irritated.

“But I need to know I am the only one in your life. I need to know that when you are with me you aren’t thinking of him.” I said as we sat on the old glider, painted yellow with the black paint underneath showing through on a few old places. My grandparents had sat on that old glider and I was the one to paint it yellow.

“He’s dead. What more do you want, do you want to bring him back to life and divorce him? Would that make you happy?” She said with a feline hiss.

“You know I don’t want that, I never wanted him to die. I was content on wanting you from a distance. Knowing that he was treating you with love and kindness. I’m sorry for acting a fool. I never meant to hurt you.” I said.

“I know you didn’t, but this ring just reminds me that I was loved. When I got the news, he had been killed in Iraq and how tragic it was I swore I would never take it off. Its been over ten years and I still feel like he is going to come home tomorrow. That’s a hell of a lot of time to work at the same diner and have the cook always telling me how beautiful I am. Can you imagine that I want to tell you that I think you’re handsome and I would love it if you asked me out? I’ve been wanting you to ask me out for so long that I sort of just got used to it never happening.”

“I wanted to, but how do I respect a brother in arms by dating his wife. I did my time in Iraq just like he did, we even crossed paths a time or two. He was a good man, and he never took a break from showing off pictures of his beautiful wife. He was so proud of you, and I wonder how he would feel about me asking you out. That’s why it took me so long. But you haven’t been with a man since that day you got the news. I think ten years is long enough.”

“I do too. He’s not coming back from the dead and I will always be his wife in some way or another. How does that even work? I’m a widow but I want to date you. Does that make me a bad person? Does that make me a cheater? I know I can’t win in everyone’s eyes. But I’m ready to move on, ready to be the woman you want.”

“I just want you as you. No changes, no makeovers, no new attitude, just you the way you are.” I said.

With a sweet and sad refrain, she leaned over and kissed me. It was a soft peck at first then she pushed harder. About a minute later we were tasting each other in a way that only happens once. That first kiss, that beautiful first kiss. You only get one and it better be good or the entire relationship will go down in flames.

The rain gently began to drizzle on the ground. It was a soft rain, the kind you dance under if you are just the right amount of crazy. She grabbed my hand and led me down the front porch steps out into the rain as it lightly fell onto the ground. She began to dance to the music of the rain, swirling around and around. I laughed so hard and just danced with her. We were soaked through our clothes. We were soaked in each other.

She drug me back on the porch and began undressing me, I helped her out of her wet dress and grabbed the entire mess of drenched clothes and made my way into the laundry room, she covered herself with the Afghan on the couch. I put the clothes in the dryer and started the cycle and covered myself with a towel. I met her in the den and she wrapped her arms around me.

“I was thinking, maybe, that you would stay with me tonight.” I said with apprehension because I wasn’t ready for rejection. I just wasn’t ready for it. I could handle a maybe or maybe another night but a flat out no would have rocked me to my core.

“I’d like that very much.” She said and there was that taste of honey suckle on my tongue again. She was beyond sweet, beyond succulent. She was herself and that was more than enough.

We made our way up the stairs as they creaked with our weight pushing down on the old hard wood. I led her into the bedroom. I had fixed it up when she agreed to come over, I put on fresh linens and cleaned the comforter. I even swept and mopped these old floors; I wanted it to be perfect. Somehow, I knew her husband would appreciate the care I was taking of his baby. But she wasn’t his anymore, she was mine. So sorry how that worked out but what’s fair is fair.

She dropped the Afghan, and I dropped my towel and we stood as God made us. She rubbed her finger down my chest and placed her right hand on my chest, curling her fingers in my chest hair. I put my hand on the nape of her neck and supported it as I kissed her hard. She wrapped her hands around me and pulled me closer.

We fell back on the bed, and I could see the ceiling fan spinning round and round. I was hypnotized by it as she kissed my neck and then we began to make love. I was lost in a field of daisies chasing her, she was wearing a red skirt with a blue jean shirt tied at the belly. I tried to keep up with her, but she was going so fast. The flowers smelt so sweet, but it was her I was smelling. She was as fragrant as those damn flowers.

“Can we slow it down a little I want to enjoy it; I want to savor it.” I said.

“This won’t be the last time we do this, far from it. So keep up with me and enjoy the ride.” I did what I was told. After all she was the boss, and she was the one who made the first move. It was her game, and I was just her toy, and I was glad to be. I was glad to be whatever she wanted me to be.

We made love over and over throughout the night as the rain came and went. The bedroom window was open and it was cool enough to cover up with the blanket, our bodies entwined.

I awoke the next morning to find her gone. I thought the worst. It was just a one night stand but was that so bad. It was enough to make a man go insane. I wasn’t asking for much, just a relationship with her. I envisioned us as a couple, hell I wanted to make us breakfast. I made my way to the kitchen to find that she had left the coffee pot on for me and fresh cup sitting in front of the pot.

That morning I found a letter on the kitchen table and the ring lying by its side. The note read,

Tommy,

Sorry to leave so soon, I wanted you to rest. I have morning shift at the diner. I know you work lunch and I look forward to seeing you. I’m leaving the ring with you to do with it what you want. I have worn it too long. And its time for a change and I hope that change involves you.

Sarah

XOXOXOXO

I was without words. I poured my coffee as I read the letter over and over. I don’t know, maybe I expected that I read it wrong and she was letting me down easily, but it was clear, she wanted more and I was ready and willing to give it to her.

I left a little early and drove down to Roy’s Used Cars and traded in my old truck for a ’59 Cadillac convertible. I got a good trade and only had to spend a little of my savings to get the car that I wanted to drive her around in. One thing was certain, she deserved to be driven around in a Cadillac.

I headed to work and put on my apron and smiled at Sarah, the kind of smile that says more than a thousand words could ever speak. When lunch shift was over and she was ready to leave, I still had a few more hours to go. She came to me and asked if I would like to come over and stay at her place tonight. I told her I would love that but I wanted to take her for a nighttime drive. She laughed and said, “In that old truck of yours?”

I pointed to the parking lot and showed her my new Cadillac.

“It’s a 1959 model. I figure if I have a fine woman to drive around I needed a better car than that old F-150.” She was excited to say the least.

“Will you let me drive it?” She asked like a fifteen year old girl with her daddy’s new car.

“As much as you like.” I said.

“Okay, I’ll see you at seven, I’ll make a casserole and put it in the oven at seven and we can drive for a few hours while it cooks. We can go down old Parkinson Road with the top down.” I agreed and went back inside.

We drove that night until the Caddie needed gas and then we headed back to her place. She fixed the best damn casserole I had ever eaten. We finished dinner and she asked if I wanted dessert and led me to the bedroom. I was one lucky son of a bitch. I was so damn lucky.

Six months later I had her ring fitted with a collar of diamonds that surrounded the original stone. In all it came out to 2 carats, and I had it remounted in a new setting. Something borrowed, something new, you know the saying. I gave her the ring when we took the Cadillac up to the mountain and parked on the top next to the radio towers. We could see the entire town and I ignored it all and just fixated on her. I said I wanted to go slow, to make it easy on her. She understood, but tonight I wanted her to be my bride and my best friend. For life.

She said yes and we would be married in the summer. She loved the ring, she thought using the original stone was a good idea, it was a way to always remember Richard.

“See I left it for you because I know you and I know you would do something remarkable with it.” She said.

“I just didn’t want you to ever forget him but always remember me too.”

“You are all I think about. He’s just a good memory like that first romance you have in high school.”

“You were all I thought about in high school.” I confessed.

She was shocked. “Why didn’t you ever say so?”

“You and Richard were tight back then and I liked him, I didn’t want to steal you from him.” She thought on this for a moment.

“I wish you would have, maybe I would haven’t had to lose him just to find you. But isn’t that the way the past is? You wish it was one way but it ended up being different.”

“I wouldn’t change a thing because you were always loved by him and the only thing I have ever wanted was for you to be loved.” I said.

“I have been, haven’t I?” She said in deep thought. Angels want for nothing. And she was my angel.

And yes she had been loved. For years she was loved. I never stopped loving her.

You know the rest of the story. It all started on a rainy night in the summer, and we stayed married until our last days and we drove that Cadillac until we got too old to drive. But all those years I was glad that she had been loved by two good men, two men who would have done anything for her. But I was with her until the end.

I never regretted a thing.

Copyright 2024 james Heaton all rights reserved